Was the first one the live episode? Because it was especially odd viewing, as the John Stape and Molly, Kev and Tyrone stories trundled to their sort-of conclusions.
There seemed to be two main thrusts - Peter and Leanne's respective stag and hen dos, and Molly, Tyrone, Kev and the 'baybeh', with John Stape ably supporting by hammering that Tweeny in the back of the head.
And of course lurking in the background was the much trumpeted tram crash - I knew that tram would be trouble. As soon as they added it to the new CGI credits I said to Mrs Biff: 'That tram'll be trouble.'
As usual with Corrie's Monday efforts the first episode was mainly the set up to the second's punchlines and there was clearly a real effort to keep up the who'llgetit? angle. Various characters were doing odd things - there was more than a hint of Who shot Mr Burns? about proceedings - as the end of the broadcast approached (what they deuce was Rita up to?), all designed to keep us guessing.
Except it didn't with me - and I love Corrie - because I just wasn't arsed who got it. I'd like Rita to be okay because she's a good character and Barbara Knox has got ace comic timing, but there aren't too many others that I'd really hope are okay.
I think that's because the show's lost its way a bit lately, with the Tyrone/Stape storylines a prime example - does anyone really care? And now they have this - all rather EastEnder-ish - tram crash/cull. This isn't what Coronation Street does best, it doesn't need this sort of showiness.
Corrie's at its greatest when good actors are working with great scripts and direction - when it looks effortless: Bet and Alex, Steve and Caron, Tyrone and Kirk, Rita and Norris.
That's not what we got last night, as Nick and Leanne's bar blew up (I must have missed something there - how did that happen?) and everyone on the street rushed out, understandably, to see what the hoo-ha was. Something must be up when I'm actually willing death on some of them. Especially Stape, who was dialling 999 when the show's climax of death hit, then stopped. So presumably he's going to drag the body over and dump it with the rest. He's the angel of death with a set-square fringe that one.
Then came the coup-de-grace with the tram hurtling towards the bridge, which had been damaged by the blast. As the camera zoomed in on the driver as his tram smashed down on to the street it looked like some awful offcut from the old Dr Who.
Presumably Corrie don't have the budget to have made it look better, but if that's the case, don't bother. This is one of the best television programmes ever - it's not a shoot-em-up video game and doesn't need to try and be one.
Hopefully it got some more viewers, which I supposed is the point of all this (as well as celebrating 50 years of 't Street). But if that's what they want maybe ITV could try keeping it on at regular times and stop shifting it for shite football matches in the Champions League group fucking stages.
In other news I'd say, pre-smash, Leanne looked much better than normal in her glad rags - that big massive forehead bone wasn't as prominent as usual and the gozzyness appeared to be minimal.
All in all, a solid 6.5/10 for this viewer (the double bill not Leanne).
And for those who can't tell reality from fiction, there's this