Make soup, pull women, get cool, YES

Not all lentils were used

Like me you probably like soup. And also like me you probably think most shop-bought soups are rubbish - especially those Covent Garden piss and salt ones.
So what to do? Make your own, lezzers, that's what. It's dead easy, tastes ace and will make chicks dig you. Guaranteed. So here's my easy chicken and veg soup (which takes its start point from one of Jamie Oliver's books).

You will need most of this stuff:
One big onion or two little 'uns
Two sticks of celery
Two carrots (I only had one though)
Handful of mushies
Some cooked chicken
Two cloves of garlic
Curry powder
Lentils
Olive oil
Two stock cubes
Pepper
Water
A big massive pot (for cooking)
Hand blender (for blending)

It's dead easy. Chop the veg up so it's about 1cm square or so, crush the garlic, put the pot on a medium heat, lash some olive oil in there. Then put the garlic and veg in and stir it all up good style, add the chicken and curry powder after a couple of minutes (up to you how much, I did a couple of shakes from the pot) then stir so everything's coated. Put the lid on, but not closed, and stir every 30 seconds or so until 10 minutes have elapsed from the time you bunged it all in.
Make up one stock cube with boiling water (500ml), bung it in the pot. Do another one and bung that in. Bring to the boil then simmer with the lid on for about 10 minutes (if there's enough stuff in there put about another 200ml of boiling water in - I only had a bit of chicken so didn't bother), when it's simmered all nice like put a load of pepper in and have a taste.
Then all you have to do is blend it (nice and steady pulse action needed here) until it's reached the consistency you like. Then serve up and watch the women come flocking to your door. Proper.

Chop that veg, motherflipper!

After stirring veg, add stock. Mmmm, stock

After simmering, blend it (picture has flipped here)

Get it eaten!