Monday, 2 May 2011

A dead bad sandwich in Deptford

Marks out of 8billion
Sarnies rule. They are one of the greatest things ever - so why is it so hard to get a good one?
I went to the reasonably-vaunted Deptford Project for a bank holiday treat of a cup of coffee and a bit of dinner (lunch if you're posh). The coffee - cappuccino with semi-skimmed milk - was fantastic, but the sandwich was an abomination.
First off they didn't have any chicken - the sandwich choice was basic at best: egg, bacon, ham - so I went for ham salad on thick white bread. The ham and salad wasn't awful but the bread was almost stale. If I dished this up at home it'd get lashed in my face, and rightly so. Normally I'd send it back but they were short staffed and it had took about 30 minutes to arrive and I couldn't be arsed waiting for another.
I ate it like. I was starving, and to be fair I was offered reparation when I pointed out after that the bread was rubbish, but it's what this represents that's the problem. The Deptford Project sells quiche apparently, but I don't want quiche - I want a sarnie. A big one. On event bread.
So why couldn't I have one? Because there is a fundamental, cultural problem in this country. The sandwich should be cherished, revered. It should be every bit as important as a good cup of tea.
As it is, sarnies are the runt of the commercial grub world, chucked out with contempt on shit bread with piddly fillings.
New York has it right, and it starts with the bread. If you're selling food and your sarnies are on basic sliced bread - brown or white - then you're a disgrace. Yes, YOU Peter de Wits cafe in Greenwich with your 'best ingredients' piffle - FIVE POUNDS for a chicken salad sarnie? For shame!
You are out of your mind - if I pay a flim for sandwich then it better be one of the wonders of the world. I want people gathering round it in awe, talking in hushed tones. And let me tell you, food-fans, the chicken salad one I had at de Wit's was moderate at best.
That was a year ago, and I'm still livid about it. The Deptford Project said they'll sort me out next time I go, which is nice, but the problems run deeper than that. Sort your act out, food sellers of Great Britain.


  1. BRAVO BIFF! you can't beat a decent sandwich but when they are bad it makes me cry for the ingredients.

  2. the worst thing is, you never know if its going to be your last one. i'd be gutted if that was it for me, sarnie-wise

  3. excellent biff - it is always a major dissapointment if only 'normal' white or brown bread is on offer. it's as if they think stale bread is made acceptable by cutting it into small triangles.

  4. Trouble with New York sandwiches is that they have to be held together with a cocktail stick they are so overfilled, and you need a knife and fork to eat them! The ratio of bread to filling is a careful balance that should be respected. And you are right, good quality bread and ingredients are so important! My favourite sandwich is cheese and pickle but again there's a world of difference between a good zippy cheddar with homemade pickle, and the crap that masquerades as the same. I wouldn't choose the Deptford Project for a sandwich, but their quiche and salads are good. Have you tried the London Particular? Bit of a walk but worth it, in my opinion.

  5. ah, the sandwich scaffolding. I miss that. not tried the London particular, I'll give it a bash. someone recommended the one down tanners hill opposite where the bike shop used to be, that one any good?

  6. Deptford deli worth a look for sure - 'Im Indoors likes the beef sandwich they do, their bread is certainly far from white sliced!